by Sandra Williams
This is a guest post by Derek Williams. He has taken numerous psychology courses in university and is interested in continuing to explore ways to improve mental and emotional health.
Many of us live lives that are full of chaos and disruptive factors. We long for the peace that comes when the children are finally at school or the baby is asleep or the whole house is at a quiet standstill.
However, it is during these active and sometimes chaotic times that we can find ourselves losing our tempers with family members (or close friends). It is often when you are asked a simple question such as “when will supper be ready?” or “have you seen my blue math book?” that the kettle finally reaches its’ boiling point.
Some of us can’t help but to let go with a barrage of yelling about everything that our busy day has entailed from the time that we woke up to the present state that they now find ourselves in. But who is this barrage directed at?
Surely one single person has not caused us to be so stressed that they need to hear it (and hear it in spades). There has not been a child or a husband or any family member or friend that has caused this build-up of emotion to finally release it in their general direction. So why then do we direct the fruits of a rotten or stressful day in the direction of a loved one that has not caused all of this tension?
Truth be known, it is usually a matter of convenience. The person who we sometimes explode on is usually in the wrong place at the wrong time. This unfortunate scenario is known as redirection of anger. We even find ourselves yelling at a family pet when we’ve had one of “those days”
Next time before you blow up at someone who doesn’t deserve the full force of your wrath due to daily stresses, stop, step back and look at the situation. To use two clichés back to back, will you let spilled milk be the straw that breaks the camel’s back? Let’s hope not. Keep your head and let the little things go.
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